O: Brent, is this you?
N: Baracko, buddy, glad to hear back from you.
O: Sorry, my man. I’ve been so busy.
N: I understand. You’ve got an administration to put together. Don’t worry about it.
O: No, really. I’ve been very rude. I didn’t even thank you for writing that presidential endorsement. That endorsement really helped us win the election.
N: Aw shucks. You would’ve won within my little endorsement.
O: Maybe, but it wouldn’t have been a landslide. And for that I thank you.
N: It was nothing, seriously. Don’t mention it again.
O: I won’t. But more important, I’ve got to thank you for the helping with the press conference last week. That “mutt” crack you gave me was a good one, and you were right, the press loved it.
N: and you thought it might be in bad taste.
O: I won’t doubt your advice again, buddy, which is why I’m calling you now. There’s another press conference coming up to cover the economic changes and new appointments…
N: you want to nominate me for a cabinet position? Gosh. In all unabashed and undeserving humility I acc…
O: No no no no no, that’s not it. I’m worried another dog question will come up and, you know me, I'm no good with the dog stuff. But you, you're great with dog humor, like a dog whisperer but with jokes... like the dog tickler or something.
N: You need another dog joke?
O: No, I made up my own joke this time, but I need to know if it’s any good or maybe if it’s offensive. First, you need to set me up. Pretend you’re the press asking a dog question.
N: OK. Baracko, Um… I mean: Mr. President Elect (it sounds funny to call you that), have you decided on a first puppy?
O: Good question. Yes, we’ve decided on a female alaskan husky. We’ve made this decision for two reasons. One, it’s a hypoallergenic breed and so won’t aggravate Malia’s allergies. And two…
N: (…oh no…)
O: Reason number two why we're getting a female alaskan husky is… wait for it…
N: (… oh no…)
O: The second reason is that 46% of the American public has already voted that they want an Alaskan bitch in the white house.
N: oh. no. you di'nt.